10/14/08

Welcome to your News page.

Pleading Letter From You Know Who (16th Aug '07)

It’s now more years than I care to remember since I set up the original Cathay Classics site and, would you believe, two years since I changed the server to Streamline. I know this because the first two year contract expired last month. However, you will all be delighted, reassured, relieved and elated to learn that I have renewed it for a further two years.

So, dear friends and faithful followers, ya’all owes me a beer! What would be even nicer would be a few inputs, I’m certain many of you have a bit of news, even if only tells us how you are getting on. So, come on guys, please help, a couple of photos would even help – no excuses with these days of multi-million megapixel cameras, I can’t make things up. Please don’t think this as a sermon – Oh well, you can, if you like.

Thanks, in anticipation – Graham.

Boeing Seven's Courtesy Terry Duggan (15th July '07)

A fellow who works at Boeing in Everett sends along this photo and story about an historic moment in Seattle last weekend.

Amid all the 787-rollout hoopla, perhaps the coolest event went unnoticed. On Saturday night, Boeing had all of the 787 airline representatives at an event at the Museum of Flight. At 7:07 PM, an Omega Air Refueling Services 707 landed in front of the crowd (after taking off from Paine Field in Everett). At 7:17, an AirTran 717 landed. This continued until 8:17 when an Air France 777-300ER landed. In the end, the 707, 717, 727, 737, 747, 757, 767, and 777 were lined up nose-to-tail on the taxiway. It is the first time Boeing has had every 7-series airplane in the same place (not counting the 787, which couldn't make the flight, of course).

Subject: Gloucester earthquake appeal LOL (6th June '07)

A major earthquake measuring 5.8 on the Richter scale hit Coney Hill in the early hours of Friday with its epicentre near the Chip Shop .

Victims were seen wandering around aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell". The earthquake decimated the area causing approximately £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of mementos from Majorca and the Costa del Sol were damaged beyond repair. Three areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros arrived.

Severn Sound reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in Gloucester. One resident, Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5 said, "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Victoria-Storm slept through it all. I was still shaking when I was skinning up and watching Trisha the next morning." Apparently looting, muggings and car crime were unaffected and carried on as normal. The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Sunny delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery from Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.

HOW CAN YOU HELP?

This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after - items most needed include: Fila or Burberry baseball caps Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers), Shell suits (female), White sport socks, Rockport boots and any other items usually sold in Primark. Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are needed all the same.

Required foodstuffs include: Microwave meals, Tins of baked beans, Ice cream, Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew.

22p buys a biro for filling in the compensation forms. £2 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9. £5 buys B&H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those affected.

***Breaking news***

Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in raspberry alco-pop. "Where are you bleeding from?' they asked,

"Essex" said the girl, "wossit gotta do wiv you?"

Please don't forward this to anyone living in Gloucester - oh, sod it...they won't be able to read it anyway.

The Red Arrow - Reply From Tony Blair, (11 April '07)

If you signed the petition you would have received a reply from Downing Street. If not, but to keep you in the picture, below is the reply from Downing Street. So, it must have worked.

E-petition: response from the Prime Minister
 

The e-petition asking the Prime Minister to "continue funding for the Royal Air Force Aerobatics Team - The Red Arrows" is on-going. This is a response in advance of the closing date from the Prime Minister, Tony Blair.

Thank you for signing the petition on the No.10 website calling for the maintenance of the Red Arrows. It is a sign of the place they hold in the national affections that so many people have joined you in signing it - one of the highest numbers since the e-petition service began. That's why I wanted to reply personally. It's also why I am replying before the petition officially closes, in order to reassure people who are clearly concerned.

I am pleased to be able to give you good news. There are no plans to change the funding for the Red Arrows, let alone to disband them.

It is important, of course, that the MOD looks at the full range of its spending plans as part of its routine financial planning, to ensure that taxpayers' money is spent where our Armed Forces most need it. Obviously it is this review which prompted fears that the Red Arrows might be scrapped.

However, like you, the Government recognises just what an important role the Red Arrows play in our national life. As the world's premier aerobatic team, they have thrilled millions of spectators over many years. I was lucky enough to see their extraordinary skills myself only last year at the Farnborough Air Show.

More importantly, the Red Arrows have maintained public support for the Royal Air Force, encouraged recruitment, acted as ambassadors for Britain in the world and promoted British industry for many years. So I am pleased to assure you that this government fully intends to keep the Red Arrows flying.

Thank you for signing this petition, and I hope you get a chance to see the Red Arrows yourself soon.

Yours sincerely,
Tony Blair

The Red Arrow - End Of An Era? (13th Feb '07)

The latest move from Mr. Tony Blair and his Labour Party would seem to be the disbanding of the Red Arrow aerobatic team, all in the name of cost cutting. This would be a tremendous loss to the country considering the prestige the team has generated world wide since its conception, late in 1964 at Little Rissington in the Cotswolds.

Acknowledged as one of the world’s premier aerobatic teams, The Red Arrows are the public face of the Royal Air Force. The Red Arrows exist to demonstrate the professional excellence of the RAF and promote recruitment to the RAF. Evidence shows that The Red Arrows have inspired a significant number of people to join the RAF, both as officers and airmen, and to all trades, not just aircrew. (Mind you, as Neville Shute said in his book, Slide Rule "I learned my trade the hard was, I was never in the RAF" - I had to get that dig in - forgive me)

If, like me, you oppose this ridiculous move, you can add your name to a fast growing petition to Downing Street by clicking on:

http://petitions.pm.gov.uk/SaveTheReds/?ref=savethereds

You have to be a British citizen or resident. But others also qualify, see the link.

This information was originally brought to my attention by Dave Baker and Mike West, thank you both.

So, guys, extract your digit and get cracking.

Can You Help Digby - Sue Falkiner (25th Jan '07)

Digby, son of Sue and Graham Falkiner is trying to organise a class re-union for former students of Beacon Hill School. One of the former students that he is trying to locate is Stephanie Grimstead, daughter of Dave Grimstead, I'm afraid I have no contact with Grimbo but if there is anyone out there who can throw some light on Stepanie's whereabouts, Sue, Graham and, indeed, Digby would be grateful for that information. The Falkiners email address is in the Contacts page.

JOHN CLEESE'S LETTER TO AMERICA (14th Jan '07)

To the citizens of the United States of America:
 

In light of your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. Her Sovereign Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths and other territories (excepting Kansas, which she does not fancy).

Your new prime minister, Tony Blair, will appoint a governor for America without the need for further elections. Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. Then look up "aluminium," and check the pronunciation guide. You will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour', 'favour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix "ize"will be replaced by the suffix "ise." You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra'; you may elect to respell Pittsburgh as 'Pittsberg' if you find you simply can't cope with correct pronunciation. Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels (look up "vocabulary"). Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.

2. There is no such thing as "US English." We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the elimination of "-ize."

3. You will relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out Task #1 (see above).

4. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday. November 2nd will be a new national holiday, but to be celebrated only in England. It will be called "Come-Uppance Day."

5. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist then you're not grown up enough to handle a gun.

6. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. A permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.

7. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and this is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we mean. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric immediately and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.

8. The Former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling "gasoline") -roughly $6/US gallon. Get used to it.

9. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with mayonnaise but with vinegar.

10. Waiters and waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

11. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer," and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as "Lager." American brands will be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine," so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.

12. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie MacDowell attempt English dialogue in "Four Weddings and a Funeral" was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.

13. You will cease playing American "football." There is only one kind of proper football; you call it "soccer." Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).

Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the "World Series" for a game which is not played outside of America. Since only 2.1% of you are aware that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable.

14. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.

15. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due backdated to 1776.

Thank you for your co-operation.

John Cleese

Christmas Greetings - Rose & Graham (13th Dec '06)

Dear friends,

It’s hard to believe but another year is reaching its end. We used to say “another day, another dollar”, now it’s “another dollar(s), another day gone” Such is life.

Rose has been hard at work writing and posting Christmas cards to all of you whose addresses are still known to us. If you don’t receive one, we apologize and post you this note in lieu. But to all of you, we do hope that you have had a happy year and this will continue over Christmas and into the coming year. We send you all our very best wishes.

It is hard to believe that 2007 is nearly upon us and it’s almost twelve years since we left Hong Kong. After an eleven year period in Merry England we have, as you know, moved to Edinburgh. I must say that we have slightly mixed feelings about returning to Scotland. A lot has changed in the forty odd years since we last lived here. Sadly, I have to say, for the worse. Edinburgh is a great city but I’m afraid the people all seem to a bit miserable. I suppose it’s a city after all.

Leaving the whinging note, all else is fine except for a few health ups and downs, in my case, which are gradually getting sorted out. Rose, on the other hand, is fine.

All the kids are doing well:

Gail and Adrian are still sunning it in Perth WA with their three daughters, Matilda, Violet and Ruby. They are all now legal Aussies complete with passports and Ocker accents. We manage to stay in touch on a frequent basis using a video cam and the computer.

Gillian and Donald are still living near Norwich where she is now a practice partner. Surprisingly, she seems to have no aspirations of leaving England. They are also kept busy with their two kids, Finlay and Sadie.

Tania and Jason, with their son Connor are still living in Telford but are actively pursuing obtaining a visa for Australia. I wish they would hurry up, the visa rules dictate that if the majority of our children were in Australia, it would ease obtaining a visa for ourselves, which we would dearly love.

As for passing the time away, I’m still riding the big Harley Glide, when it’s not raining. I had to get rid of the other one, the Fat Boy, as we only have one garage here. Such is the price of poverty.

Once again, dear friends, faithful readers and contributors we wish you a Very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year and, on a pleading note, keep the contributions for the site rolling in.

Rose and Graham.

Remembrance (11th Nov '06)

As Remembrance weekend draws to a close, I thought I would share the following with you. I confess now that I "pinched" it from an article published in The Scotsman, the most reliable and respected broadsheet in Scotland. I hope they will forgive me but I share it with you, with thanks to them.

A poem for my father

TOM PALMER

FOR the 300 mourners, it was just too much to bear. As the poignant words of a ten-year-old girl remembering her dead father echoed around the church, tears flowed like rain.

Athena, the daughter of Flight Lieutenant Gareth Nicholas, who died in Afghanistan, said goodbye in a beautiful poem, called simply My Dad.

On the eve of Remembrance weekend, she paid tribute to her father, who died along with 13 others when their Nimrod plane, from RAF Kinloss, crashed near Kandahar on 2 September.

The first verse read: "He was a great Father for every good Reason, I wish he was still alive.

"He would still be with me if it hadn't gone wrong, I wish he had survived."

The little girl continued: "I feel like it was all a dream. But it's not what it seems. That he's still with me in my heart. And in my sad sad dreams."

Flt Lt Nicholas, 40 was one of 12 RAF personnel from 120 Squadron at RAF Kinloss in Moray killed in the accident. A marine and an army soldier also died.

At yesterday's service at St Columb Minor Church, near Newquay, Cornwall, the coffin was taken into the church draped with the Union Flag.

After Athena read her poem, Flt Lt Nicholas' widow, Helen, from Redruth, Cornwall, paid tribute to her husband. She said: "Gareth was a loving husband and devoted father, a handsome, funny, fun-loving, caring, enthusiastic and energetic man who was generous with his time.

"We had only just celebrated our 15th wedding anniversary and my last text from Gareth read: '15 years and 1 day'."

Mrs Nicholas said her husband had wanted to join the RAF from a very young age and was an air cadet before joining the service in 1983. She added: "He would have wanted people to celebrate his life and not dwell on the sadness of the occasion."

Group Captain Jerry Kessell, RAF Kinloss's station commander, said: "The ceremony was a wonderful reflection of Gareth's life."

The service was the first of 14 funerals for the British servicemen killed when the aircraft crashed.

Flight Sergeant Steve Beattie, the weapon systems operator on the doomed Nimrod, is due to be buried today. A service will be held at 12:30pm at the Forres Parish Church of St Laurence.

My dad

By Athena Nicholas

He was a great Father for every good Reason,
I wish he was still alive.
He would still be with me if it hadn't gone wrong, I wish he had survived.

I feel like it was all a dream.
But it's not what it seems.
That he's still with me in my heart.
And in my sad sad dreams.

I'm crying at this moment.
But I can't stop now.
I wish he was still with me.
And he's whispering in the clouds.

I will visit you in your dreams.
And we shall roam free.
Playing in the grassy fields.
Definitely You and Me.

I also add another little poem, the origins of which I cannot give you. I've seen it before and always thought it was most touching. I believe it was written near the end of, or shortly after the Great War.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow;
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain;
I am the gentle autumn's rain.
When you awaken in the morning hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft star that shines at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry.
I am not there; I did not die.

-Anonymous

Balmy Days In The Sun (12 Aug '06)

Don't you just remember those crystal clear, balmy days in the sun when GDO's prevailed and you got the boat out. Well, dream on:

Taken on a "crisp" March morning, this year at Chek Lap Kok - Hong Kong International airport (the new one).

Fleet News (6th Aug '06)

From my Hong Kong Correspondent, Chris Keeping.

As promised I forward Cathay's latest addition to the fleet. The DC3 arrived in Hong Kong from the Philippines in April to be repainted in time for the 60th anniversary celebrations. I guess that it must have been done by now. I understand that the original intention was to keep her flying, but it was decided that it wouldn't be good for the corporate image if something happened to her! Plan 2 was to hang her from the ceiling of the new terminal two which will be opened soon, but the airport authority declined the offer. I believe she is now destined for a pole outside Cathay's headquarters. A pity.

Attention, All you Golfers (Hackers) From Tony Hellyer (2nd Aug '06)

Dear All Another year has rolled around and it is nearly September. Time again for the annual CX pro hackers UK event. It will be on Friday Sept 8th at West Chiltington GC in West Sussex, for no better reason that it is just down the road from me ! First tee off will be at 1100 proceeded by coffee and bacon baps from 1000. Cost will be £30 plus a small prize fee TBD. Usual texas scramble format will apply. Please spread the word around to any one with a CX/HKG connection. best regards Tony

News From Hong Kong (11th June '06)

(Courtesy Tony Higgins - a dear friend)

Now for a bit of HK news. The government has announced a 1.4 percent increase in pensions for retired civil servants. This will benefit 80-thousand retirees at a cost of an extra $126 million, this financial year. That should please some of our readers.

Customs vowed yesterday to launch more raids against counterfeit syndicates that prey on tourists and expatriates. Officers arrested seven people and seized about $1 million worth of counterfeit goods. These people are real pests to visitors and do great harm to the tourist industry

Last week Cathay Pacific announced a deal to take over its smaller local rival Dragonair and cement ties with Air China, the mainland's flag carrier. The complicated cross-sharing deal that took more than two years to finalise will see state-run Air China and Cathay Pacific sharing its routes.

The Chief Secretary recently stated. “As an international financial centre, Hong Kong boasts the second-largest stock market in the region and the eighth-largest in the world, with a market capitalisation of more than $9.5 trillion. He noted that Hong Kong’s stock market had been very buoyant this year. Daily turnover in the market is at a historical high, averaging more than $30 billion per day, some 70 per cent above that of the previous year, and three times that of the year of severe acute respiratory syndrome [Sars] in 2003.

Members of an independent commission have voiced concern about a Legislative Council proposal to award themselves a 70% pay rise. I should so to!

A police constable and his bank worker wife, who stole $11 million from customers accounts at the HSBC have been jailed for four years. The whole lot went on gambling in Macau.

A recent survey showed that although one in five gamblers placed a bet before the age of 11, gambling is not a serious problem in HK. 44% thought gambling was harmless entertainment, while an additional 16% said it was a good way to kill time and build friendships. One in three even believed they had a sure-win formula for placing bets and 25% saw it as a good way to make fast money. No doubt, the copper and his tai-tai fell into the latter category.

Over100 feral cows and buffaloes live on Lantau. A cull of these animals was recently called off at the last minute after outraged residents bombarded government officials with pleas for the animals' lives to be spared.

The Hang Seng Bank will soon penalise those customers who’s accounts contain less the $5,000 by deducting $50 monthly. There are a number of exceptions to this new rule.

An extract from the RHKP Association newsletter.

Q.  I’ve heard that cardiovascular

 exercise can prolong life, is this true?

A.    Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that’s it…don’t waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that’s like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap.

Q.   What are some of the advantages of a regular exercise programme?

A.   I can’t think of a single one. My philosophy: No Pain…Good!

Q.     Is swimming good for the figure?

A.   If swimming is good for the figure, explain whales to me.

The Athens Of The North - Edinburgh (21st May '06)

This should be at the end but then, you wouldn't read it.

Get this, last week a woman went into a off-license (bottle shop) to buy a few things. Left the shop and was on the pavement (side-walk) and decided to light up a gorilla only to discover she had no matches or lighter. She asked the shop keeper for a light and being the gentleman that he was, he proffered her a light, outside the shop, but still in the doorway. Unbeknown to him there was another customer in the shop and he was one of the plain clothes snoops employed to ensure the no smoking ban is enforced. I imagine he had a long leather coat on. Anyway, bingo, he's presented with a £150 fine, on the spot. The case goes to appeal next week but don't hold your breath. Mel Gibson, in a little known Hollywood Blockbuster (can't remember the name), said "you can take our land but you can't take our FREEDOM". Wish I could print this with an Aussie accent. Mind you he was referring to the English and in particular Henry Longshanks. This "freedom theft is from within.

I have to start by stating clearly that the following is purely a personal opinion, for what that's worth.

Do you have any time to spare this coming holiday season? You've heard me rant and rave about Bonnie Scotland and in particular Edinburgh, so, why don't you give it a miss!!! Well, I'm gradually changing my tune, it's time to re-assess this one time wonderful country.

I've lived here for about nine months now and I truly am pursuing an escape route.

You must have heard of that magnificent cock-up, the Scottish Parliament, from £60 million to £800 million in just a few easy steps. Now the roof is falling down. Although it looks as if it belongs in Legoland, the building it's not as well constructed. And, from within, led by our "First Minister", Jack McConnell (erstwhile Reich fuehrer - only my opinion, of course, and lots of others, I suspect) our Scottish Executive are hell bent on turning the place into the Mother of all Nanny States.

First of all, the "smoking ban". From a vibrant hub of social night life, central Edinburgh is turning into a limp shadow of it's former self. The pubs are half empty, the other half of their customers huddled outside having a legal puff, braving the wind and rain which is the norm in this once proud city. Old men, like yours truly, ex-servicemen, some of them war heroes and the youth, feeling more and more outcast and certainly less receptive to their leaders. Welcome to the world biggest ash tray. Oh yes, I know, non smokers should not be subjected to the inconvenience of second hand smoke which they have been happy with since Walt Raleigh introduced the dreadful weed I don't know how many centuries ago. But, a total draconian blanket ban which includes country pubs where you would be hard pressed to find a non smoker. Shut up, Graham, you've said enough. By the way, the pubs are still selling fags at exorbitant prices from vending machines and the Executive have allegedly large sums of pension money tied up in tobacco companies. Shut up, again, Graham

You would think it would stop there, but no, now it allegedly seems that we are about to employ an army of thought police whose duty it will be to visit the homes of parents and instruct them in the use of cloth nappies (do you remember them) and to dissuade the use of disposables, you know, Pampers etc. Let's get real, I thought this was the twenty-first century.

The next alleged ban seem to be the sale of un-healthy pub grub. No longer the bangers and mash, pie and beans, hamburgers and chips that a lot of folk love. Although supposedly there will be an exemption for haggis, neeps and tatties.

Fox hunting has been and gone, what next? It's bound to be fishing.

Now get this, (not that subject again) I'm told by a local friend that the pavement outside a nearby pub is full of smokers but the toilets are rife with injectors, and I don't mean the type used in RB211's. I did start by saying, get this, well, get this, only a few weeks ago it was reported that our police force suggests a debate on the legalization of hard drugs and I don't mean aspirin, paracetamol or hashish. Of course that was played down by our worthy leaders in Legoland.

Anyway, why not put a couple of weeks aside this summer and visit out superb capital. Mind you, make sure you have some good walking boots as you are more than likely to sprain, indeed, break you ankles on the totally broken up pavements prevalent in most parts of the city. And, by the way, don't drive your car, it will almost certainly be clamped (or you will be issued a parking ticket by the traffic wardens who must outnumber the police by at least ten to one), it may even disappear, being towed away to the pound, but more likely, down a hole in the road, such is the state of our roads. If you do find a road which is not at least somewhat dug up, please let me know and I will add it to the "favourites" in my Tomtom.

Hey, anyway, why was I prompted to scribe this article? Well there are a few interesting places to visit, the castle, the gardens, the castle, the museums, the castle etc etc etc. But, the real reason for putting pen to paper, (finger to key board) was seeing the following advert in the local Edinburgh newspaper, the Evening News. I could not resist it, if ever there was a reason to visit the Athens Of The North, this is it:

Note the  - "All Welcome!" - I just love that bit, just make sure you don't get lost on the guided tour. Well, we can't have a puff in a pub, but we can sure as hell go up in smoke in the Athens Of The North. Oh, watch the holes in the road.

I'll probably get arrested for publishing this article' what ever happened to free speech - ho hum!

News From Hong Kong (7th March '06)

(Courtesy Tony Higgins - a dear friend)

For the 12^th. Year in a row, The Wall Street Journal has identified HK as the “freest economy in the world.” The UK was fifth and the USA ninth. No doubt delighted with this accolade, the Financial Secretary said, among other things “the Government will stick to its principle of, market leads, Government facilitates.” Good! it’s a policy that has worked so well in the past.

Local Banks are introducing a wide range of charges for the services they provide. The Hang Seng for example will charge customers $60 a month if the account falls below $10,000. Citibank charge $30 every time a customer pays off his credit card bill. Other Banks are increasing or introducing new charges which seem more likely to lose customers than gain them.

Pollution is still causing concern. Levels of nitrogen oxide are now five times the W.H.O. acceptable level. “It is pushing people into hospital beds, doctors clinics and coffins” stated a spokesman for HK University.

The Govt. has deployed 200 officers to seek out and destroy birds likely to be affected by Avian Flu. The majority are chickens but include quail, geese, ducks and pigeons. It is estimated that 1,850 householders keep chickens and ducks alone. All will need to be inspected. No compensation will be paid for any slaughtered. Last week, a passing feathered friend joined the swimmers at Morrison Hill outdoor swimming pool. Immediately, the pool was cleared of over 300 swimmers and it took four hours to cleanse the facility. Or maybe he had only stopped for a drink?

McChickens, McNuggets and all the similar burger products served in HK contain more fat and cholesterol than anywhere else in the world. 35% more than in the UK.

Being attacked by pollution, bird flu and cholesterol, so why not start smoking again ? It’ is probably the least life threatening pastime in HK at the moment  Particularly as H.K. must be the only place in the world where the price of cigarettes has actually fallen. Tax has not increased for 5 years and a local price war has reduced some popular brands to just $21 a pack. Like other Governments who condemn the practice, they nevertheless profit to the tune of $16 per pack and are likely to increase this sum significantly in the next budget. This is expected to increase smuggling which last year led to the arrest of 5,895 people involved in 51,696 cases..

The last car number plate auction was held at the Convention Centre last week. 32 plates were sold for $4.5 million. A certain Mrs. Chau who took home plate number 123 described it as “cute and memorable. Very memorable at $1.5 million! Car owners can now apply to the Transport Dept. for their own personalised number plates using a maximum of eight characters of their own choice, including blanks. Should be fun.

Things aint what they used to be. The Association of Teachers from the English Schools Foundation placed a large advert in the SCMP a couple of weeks ago aimed at potential applicants for jobs. “Last year there was a 4.42% salary cut. This year there will be another cut of 5%. Responsibility allowance is to be cut by 33%. Gratuity at the end of contract will be reduced from 25% to 20% next year. Morale is at an all time low.”  Understandable I suppose.

Christmas Greetings - Rose & Graham (19th Dec '05)

Hi good friends, faithful readers and contributors. Rose and I would like to wish you all the compliments of the season. You are all always in our thoughts.

Also, we have an apology to make: Since our move to Edinburgh, for some reason, we have mislaid many of your addresses and we won't be able to send the number of cards that we normally do. Consequently, please accept these words as greetings from us. What we have saved in trees and rain forests will and I repeat will be donated to charity (not my own).

We thank the many of you who so kindly sent us cards this year. These were re-directed to our new address. We have responded to those of you whose addresses we know.

We would consider it a privilege if you would all send us an email with your present address on it. Having said that, we are remiss in not giving you details of our new address which is:

3A Tipperlinn Road,

Morningside

Edinburgh EH10 5ET

Tel: 0131 447 4279

For those of you who don't know Edinburgh, Morningside used to be the place where "you emptied your rubbish (garbage) with your fur coat on" and "sex was what you kept your coal in". Such used to be the poshness of the area, but now we live there. In case you haven't worked it out, sacks up here are pronounced secks.

Any of you visiting Edinburgh will receive a hearty welcome from us

In the meantime, we are heading south of the border in the next day or so to spend Christmas and New Year with Gillian, Donald and their two children - baby sitting, in other words. So, the site may be a bit quiet for a couple of weeks.

In conclusion, have a great festive season, keep well and please keep in touch.

Aero Club History (19th Dec '05)

I've been informed by Alan that he now has sufficient information about the history of the Aero Club and wants to thank all of you who responded.

News From Hong Kong (7th Nov '05)

(Courtesy Tony Higgins - a dear friend)

Kevin Sinclair that well known columnist, recently commented on the strike by H.K. lifeguards “In my next reincarnation, I want to come back to life as a Hong Kong lifeguard. It's a pretty good existence. You get to laze about in a beach pavilion with your pals ogling pretty girls and wondering what's cooking for lunch. For this, you get paid up to $14,330 a month.” Any vacancies?

More local news.  If you wish to win the Mark Six, buy your ticket from the Jockey Club`s Haiphong Road office. More major prizes have been won by punters buying from here, than anywhere else. So much so, that this “lucky” office recently attracted seven lengthy queues which totally blocked the pavements of Tsim Sha Tsui.

Lane Crawford House on Queen's Road Central is on the market and offered for development. It is expected to sell at around $2 billion, making it the most expensive land sale in ten years.

A 60 year old woman was recently detained by mainland customs for smuggling nearly $2.2 million, in cash from H.K. which was stuffed inside seven giant potatoes. (those spuds must have been massive!) 

A recent survey of local people revealed that the biggest plus for living in H.K. was the freedom that the population enjoyed, and the biggest minus, pollution.

Police have seized 1.8 tonnes of smuggled American ginseng, worth $2.4 million, from a speedboat following a high-speed night pursuit off Sha Tau Kok.

Swire Properties have submitted a plan to Govt. which proposes to extend Victoria Park down to the harbour front and will include a large sandy beach To improve the overall appearance, this largely increased land area would sit on the top of a submerged Central-Wan Chai bypass.

Govt. accept, that in order to conserve fish stocks, about 8% of fishing grounds around Sai Kung must be protected. It is estimated that about 300 fishermen and 30 trawlers operating in the area would be affected. 

Bruce Lee who will always be remembered for his Kung Fu movies is to be honoured by having a statue erected to his memory on the Kowloon waterfront.

Among other bits of advice on bird flu, a Govt. spokesman suggests that “you do not kiss your pet parrot”.

It is predicted that average salaries will increase from 2.6 to 3 per cent this year - more evidence that economic confidence is returning.

The 500 plus Admin Officers in the Govt. are an elite group who formulate the policy of the territory. In July, just 20 recruits were appointed from the 14,000 applicants.

I well remember the Mandarin Hotel being built in 1964. Now it is to be refurbished in a US$140 million facelift. Yes, the Captains Bar is to get the chop. A great watering hole that was run like clockwork by that doyen of H.K. barmen, Francis. I remember they had a very strict dress code. The daughter of John Marden was once stopped by the Captain and informed that ladies wearing trousers were not admitted. “No problem” she said, taking them off, neatly folding them over her arm, trailing a wordless official in her wake.

An extra couple of thousand a month on your salary is worth having but when it continues for 16 years its worth more than manna from heaven. Now a clerical assistant in the Social Welfare Dept. is wondering if they are going to claim back the $500,000 he has been overpaid.

In 1982, after being charged with an offence Mr.Yao Tao-fa, skipped bail. Returning from the U.S.A. last week, the long arm of the law pounced at the Airport. Which goes to show that some Govt. systems work.

Such is the pollution problem that serious consideration is being given to provide masks for policemen. This will not be the first time they have been worn by bobbies. During the SARS epidemic in 2003 masks became almost obligatory. The smog has now become so intense that it has been suggested that joggers cease their activities. Up to 30 times more air is inhaled by runners and as so much of it is pure yuk, they are probably doing themselves more harm than good. What are the Hash House Harriers going to do now ? Stay in the bar I suppose.

Without crossing a single road, a canny Hongkonger can sip his cafe latte in SoHo, buy a genuine Afghan carpet in Hollywood Road, have a beer in Cochrane Street, wander into the stock exchange, view the world's top brand names at The Landmark, then stroll in air-conditioned ease to the Airport Express, check in and fly away. Thanks to a tightly integrated network of elevated walkways linking buildings in Central, underground connections between MTR lines and the world's longest escalator, pedestrians can make their way with ease around a significant area of the city's heart without having to negotiate the crammed pavements. Eat your heart out John Prescott.

New (Alternative) Web Address (23rd Sept '05)

I can't seem to get the hyperlinks to the other web address to work when I click on the link, a few paragraphs below this. I don't know why, apologies if you have the same problem. The address is correct - www.cathayclassics.co.uk If you do have problems, type it in the hard way, it does work - G.

Only Me and My Computer. (31st August '05)

Am I the only one or does everyone have hassles with computers? I've just trashed my operating system and all I did was load SP2. I'm doing this on an old machine that ought to be in a museum. Fortunately, a friend, who really is a computer whiz is going to help me out tonight. Also, we (he) is going to try to set me up with a wireless network. Apparently this can cause problems, although not insurmountable, with FTP and websites. So, if all goes quiet for a few days, please have patience, it should get sorted out. If not, it will be back to old fashioned hard wiring!!!

Us - Rose & Graham (15th August '05)

It's all over, bar the shouting. We are finally ensconced in Edinburgh. After a hectic couple of weeks, clearing out all the absolutely essential junk that accumulated in ten years in England, the packers finally arrived. Their efforts came to culmination at mid-day, Friday 29th July. Final tidying up took place followed by a hasty retreat half way north to a hotel in Crewe. What a relief that was, feet up for a couple of hours, followed by a few welcome jugs at the bar and the first decent meal that we had had in a week.

Next day, up to Edinburgh, fighting our way through the usual mad summer rush of caravans and motor homes (don't you just hate them).

A weekend followed, clearing out similar junk, which we just couldn't do without, accumulated over eighteen years in Edinburgh.

It's taken Rose and me the last two weeks to unpack masses of cardboard boxes, the contents of more than a few of them should have been ditched before we left Swanmore. More trips to the tip and to the local charity shops. But, it's almost over now, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Talk about a shock to the system, from a five bedroom house and nearly three acres in the sticks to a three bedroom apartment close to the city. But, it's only a thirty minute walk to the Royal Mile (five minutes by bus or taxi) which is packed with street performers of all descriptions, due to the festival, particularly the fringe, being well under way. We are loving it, been to the Military Tattoo already and a couple of shows.

Anyway, back up and running, ready to receive the stacks of inputs from you all. Looking forward to hearing from you.

Us - Rose & Graham (23rd July '05)

After the typical hassle with house selling that you can only find with solicitors and estate agents in England, we have, at last, exchanged contract and have a completion date of Friday 29th July. You just don't have the same problems in Scotland.

Anyway, Ashrafiya was getting just too big to be practical and we have decided to "downsize". In effect we shall be moving to the apartment in Edinburgh that we bought some eighteen years ago. We intend to drive up next Saturday and the rattle from my faithful Volvo will be the clink of coins, not the car. We will not have our furniture installed till the following Tuesday and it will take a bit of time to get organized thereafter. So, don't expect too many changes on the site for a couple of week. But, if you do have a contribution, please send it to me, my email address will remain the same.

If anyone would like our new address (handy for sending Christmas cards, Birthday cards, Donations and Blank Cheques, drop me an email and I will send it to you. For those of your desperate to get in touch, our mail will be re-directed as will telephone calls to our present number. New number is: 0131 447 4279.

New Website Address (23rd July '05)

I mentioned a while ago that I was giving thought to getting a proper web hosting service and I did try one on a three month trial. I have now gone permanent with this host, for two years, at least. It's faster to upload and download and you will not see any adverts. There's nothing new in the site, it will be exactly the same as the old one which I intend to keep up to date for the foreseeable future. It will, however, disappear eventually, so pass the word.

The address of the new site is:

http://cathayclassics.co.uk/

and there is a link to it under Favourite Links on the News page. But with a straightforward name as above, even pilots should be able to remember it!!! (Only a joke, some of my favourite pets were pilots)

Oh, I might get generous some time in the future and password protect it, that would enable me to get rid of all those nasty "X's" in the email addresses in the Contacts page..

Cathay Pacific Museum (2nd July '05)

I have received, like many of you, the following email from Bob Nipperess. Not all of your email addresses are available to him so, in an effort to spread the news, I am copying the email below for your edification.

Dear Cathay retiree,

I hope that you are enjoying your retirement and that you are finding the new retiree website both informative and useful. The Company continues to expand and we are continuing our work to make travel a more streamlined process. More about that subject in due course. 

My purpose in writing to you today is to bring you up to date with an exciting development within the Company. In September 2006 Cathay Pacific Airways will celebrate its 60th anniversary and we are going to establish a museum here in Cathay City to commemorate the event.

Many thanks for the picture, chaps. Could do with a lot more news like that.

By the way, for Trish Ellis, have a look at the Peoples Page, Dianne Duggan is trying to contact you.

News From Hong Kong (7th July '04)

(Courtesy Tony Higgins - a dear friend)

Now for some H.K. news. I  thought that Vietnamese illegal immigrants were history. Apparently not. Two of them recently attempted to rob a taxi driver. Nimbly, bailing out of his vehicle, the driver zapped the central locking system at the same time. Not being attuned to modern technology and unable to open the doors, the miscreants had no option but to wait patiently until the law arrived. Later 29 others, carrying an arsenal of weapons, were also captured.

The Electoral Affairs Commission has proposed that a $5,000 fine be levied on anyone carrying a mobile phone, at voting centres at the next elections. It has also been suggested that the curtains which ensure privacy at the booths be removed. The reason for this is that a significant number of voters have been coerced to vote for certain "pressure groups" and as evidence of their loyalty required to photograph their ballot papers.

Next month, 1,000 lifeguards will stage a swim across the harbour to protest at their conditions of employment. The Govt. employs 1,580 of these people and recently reduced their salaries from $11,115 to $8,300 p.m. It seems they have something to gripe about.

For the second year running, it looks as though the International Dragon Boat races will be cancelled. Last year it was SARS, this year a shortage of cash. Sponsors are being eagerly sought.

Mrs. Cai Ai-lan had an 84cm plasma TV set mounted above a fishpond in her Kowloon Tong garden, until a wild monkey broke it. Now she is suing the Govt. for the $32,850 it cost for repairs. 

Despite the turndown in the economy, Hong Kong households are still  the second richest in Asia per capita behind Japan. The Central to Mid Levels public escalator now carries an average of 450,000 people each day. Why don't other major cities introduce similar superb public amenities ? More of them are planned for H.K.

Now hear this ? a mobile phone user recently suffered more than an ear bashing when his phone exploded due to a dodgy fake battery being fitted.

 CLASSES FOR WOMEN.

Training courses are now available for women on the following subjects:

1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits
4. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First
5. Communication Skills II : Thinking Before Speaking
6. Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
7. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
8. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
9. Introduction to Parking (hahahahahahaha)
10. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space

Sorry girls, I couldn't resist that. ( I couldn't resist adding it - Graham)

Now for some sad news. The Yuen Long crocodile has finally met his inevitable fate, being captured, losing his freedom and being incarcerated in a "suitable environment". It wasn't modern technology or the combined efforts of expensive overseas "experts" which was his eventual downfall. Just an old fashioned noose. It was a 65 year old fisherman, Mr. Ng Lo-tau and his good lady wife, who though "terrified of the thrashing reptile", secured our old pal with their fishing nets. A bystander who witnessed the incident was highly critical, stating, "Govt. officials were impolite to Mr. Ng, they did not thank him or even offer to pay for his damaged nets". Now, the croc, who incidentally has turned out be a her, and not a him, will be the star attraction at a wetland theme park. Pity, still better than being the star attraction at an exotic banquet or finishing up as a handbag I suppose.

Tai Hang Hau ( 7th July '04)

Received a reply from Ron Knight in response to the email I sent you all. In it was an observation of Ron's recent visit to Tai Hang Hau that thought might be of interest to those of you, including myself, who lived there. As follows: 

Just a matter of interest for you... I went back to Tai Hang Hau Village in Feb 04 to visit a villager friend of mine (Johnny... millionaire property owner still working in CX House mail room) and I cud not believe the number of houses that have gone up there... you were next to Mike Bradley weren't you? I know you started CX at the same time as Mike but cant remember if you also bought in Tai Hang Hau Village.  The small valley in front of Pat Dunnes(later Crombie Gilbraithes and Tubby Grant's houses is totally built out and the views across the water, gone!  Even got security d..wits stopping you from walking down the roadway to the waterfront cum beach.... have u seen Junk Bay? Bloody hell, one wonders where they were all living before!  Nice to drive along Clearwater Bay Road for memories too.

For You Golfers (6th July '04)

Dear Cathay Classics,

Just to let you know this years golf day will be held at Sherfield Oaks, Basingstoke on Sept 10th.  Tee off will be at 10am As ever, the emphasis is on fun and meeting old buddies  rather than competition with a texas scramble format. Please let me know if you are interested,  Hackers of all abilities most welcome.

regards

Tony  Hellyer

Tony's email address is on the Contacts page - G

Cathay Retiree Web Site ( 23rd May '04)

No doubt I'm preaching to the converted and most of you will have accessed the new Cathay Retiree Web Site already. If not, I recommend you try it. It's not at all bad and there are prospects other future additions, the most welcome being the facility to purchase tickets. Let me know what you think of it. By the way, I have contacted Bob Nipperess to see if he has any objections to a link being added to this site to take you to the Retiree site. On a positive response I shall add such a link to the home page.

Impending Piss-up (14th May '04)

Received the following from Dick Marsh for your information. Hope he gets a worthy response and the get-together proves a success. I wish someone in the UK would do the same - any takers?

Dear Graham,

The kids names are, oldest to youngest, Matilda, Violet and Ruby. It was, in fact our first sight of Ruby as she was born in Australia last year. You can well imagine that we had a great, remaining four weeks in Perth.

As mentioned earlier, Brian and Anne were extremely kind to us. The only thing was he forgot to mention the monthly gathering of retired Cathay folk at the Albion Pub on the Stirling Highway. But, to make up and truly make Rose and my day, he did a phone around and organized a lunch on the Friday after his return from his own holiday at Whistler. You can well imagine our surprise when twenty-two old friends turned up, we were overwhelmed.

As promised, a gallery of photos taken by Ken Hart and myself, how many do you recognize? (I'm the youngest looking guy - none of the ladies have changed much at all)